Patient Diary -- Pat Lauricella

Hello PH World. I am a 55 year old woman diagnosed with SPH (Obstructive Sleep Apnea) in August, 2000 after a bout of congestive heart failure. I had my RHC right after a stay in the hospital. I have been overweight all my adult life and been pretty healthy until about three months prior. My cardiologist came in and seriously said "I have good news and bad news." The good news is that I did not have any blockages, that they could fix. The bad news was that I had PH and there was no cure. I stopped for a minute and thought, OH! He suggested that I see a pulmonary doctor. My primary doctor set it up and I went through all the lung tests. His opinion was that it was my heart, not my lungs causing the problem. Back to square one and the cardiologist said my lungs were the problem. To make a long story short, I went another year without any change in meds or anything else. I was again in the hospital 6 months later.

Well, things had gotten desperate for me. Maybe if I lost the weight I would feel better. Several co-workers had gastric by-pass surgery and I was having a terrible time loosing weight, so I decided to try. Called the surgeon and did all the paperwork, got an appointment. After anxiously waiting, the surgeon said no way would he do surgery on me, since I had severe PH (PAP of 83). He said that he felt that my doctors were just letting me survive by looking at my meds. Talk about your heart hitting the floor!! I cried in the restroom and didn't care who heard me. I cried all the way from Nashville to my home (over 100 miles). I called my primary doctor the next morning and Dr. Wright (the surgeon) had already told her the news. She apologized for not following through with the other doctors. The year before, I felt that it must not be as serious as I thought. That's what I get for thinking under stress.

I am now on calcium channel blockers, have changed some of my blood pressure meds, O2 24/7, etc. In 2002 alone, I was hospitalized 4 times for congestive heart failure with pneumonia. I have a terrible time with edema in feet, legs and abdomen. Some days I think the diuretics just don't do their job.

Next to the last hospital stay, my Primary doctor called in a new pulmonary doctor. She had worked in a PH Clinic in NY for a while, so she had some knowledge. She ordered me a hospital bed so that my head would be elevated all the time and she ordered me an electric wheelchair so that I could continue to work.

Speaking of work, I better get back to it! I have had to learn not to be so independent. The girls here in the office have been so good. They fetch and get for me...lunch, drinks, etc. It took a lot for me to give in to this...pride is sometimes a hindrance in the PH world!

I hope everyone that reads this has a great day and God bless.

Well this has been a day...got my electric chair yesterday. No ramps yet to get it out of the house and no way to get it into vehicle. My whole family was sick during the holidays and had no time or way to check out these necessities and of course, insurance doesn't pay for them. Went last night (Thurs) for a Nasal CPAP Trail and after sitting there for 2 hours, they say I'm not on their book. Talk about communication! Well today (Fri.) my husband goes to the doctor to find out he may have an infected appendix. Tonight (Fri.) we spent 3 1/2 hours in ER and then they admitted him for observation. Talk about "When it rains, it pours!"

It is officially the 11th by my central standard time. I need to go to sleep, but I had to wind down first. Thought I would check my emails. Decided to post since I may be elsewhere tomorrow. They say try not to stress yourself. They don't need to worry about me, everyone else does it for me. :)

Here's my husband in severe pain and he is worrying about who will take care of me. Maybe I've let him spoil me too much. I will do what I can and call in the reserves for the things I can't do. That's what family and friends are for...right!!

I am closing for now and take my beauty sleep. I wish all a beautiful and happy Saturday...Make the sun shine even when it isn't. Love to all my PH friends. By the way "Thanks" to all of you who sent me Christmas cards...I didn't get to send mine due to hospitalization. Be blessed.

Well, it's still Sunday evening here, but soon to be Monday. Well Saturday was a whirl-wind of a day. Got up early to visit my husband in the hospital. Brrrr, it was so cold..made my bones shake. I had buttoned my jacket up so that my nose and mouth were covered. I got my big tank of O2 with a regulator out of the car and made my way through the parking lot (no close handicap parking). Thought this was the closiest entry.LOL I walked around to the elevator and made my way to his room, totally out of breath by now. Got in his room and still couldn't catch my breath. My husband in one of his awake moments says "Honey you forgot to turn your O2 on...duh! No wonder I was so breathless!! Remember, I said the other day that I was a little spoiled. I was so used to my husband warming up the car and turning on the O2 tank before I went to work. Shame on me!!

Well, the doctor finally came in and to make a long story short, they took out my husband's appendix. He was supposed to come home Sun. but his cold was still bad, so they let him stay another day. I worked Friday and sat with him at the hospital until close to 11 and then stayed all day Sat. My legs were so swollen it was hard for me to walk. I got home at 9:30 and was sound asleep by 10. I had called my mother before going to sleep and my father was going to be in town, so he was going to stay with my husband and possibly bring him home. This way I could rest and hpefully not get sick. As he did not get to come home, I went Sunday afternoon and spent time with him. Since he slept alot, I went home around 7. I was watching my 5 yr. old neice also. She was getting tired, which meant rowdy, so we came home and watched some TV. In all this I managed to put dishes from Thurs. night and Friday in the dishwasher and wash some others.

Mom made some homemade veggie soup and it sure was good on this cold, cold day. Thank God for you Mom. I love you and Dad more than all the words in the world. I thought I would take care of you and dad when you got old and you are taking care of me. Thanks for taking the dog home with you. He is so attached to me that he whines and tears all the pillows and blankets off the furniture. I spoiled in while I was off work so long and sitting at home with him. Now if I don't pet and make over him when I walk in the door, he pouts and whines. I still love the old dog.

Well, it's been a long day and I am really tired. I am going to sleep. Take care and God bless each and everyone of you.

Diary, I am here once more. My husband is still in the hospital...pneumonia. I went in last night for my sleep study. It turned out to be a toss and turn study. You know how sometimes you get so tired that you can not fall asleep...well, that was last night. I'm now used to my hospital bed and they had a king size bed with the hardest mattress. I could not get comfortable. They also put me to sleep sooner than I was truly ready. I think I finally fell asleep around 3 just to be awakened at 5 a.m. My husband did not get to go home, so I spent from 5:30 a.m. until 5 p.m. with him. Talk about tired when I got home. I think I slept better in that very uncomfortable chair in his room than I did at my sleep study.

I came home and ate somemore of Mom's soup and sat back and watched TV. Thought I would check my emails and jot some down for the dairy. I am going to bed soon in my own blessed bed. I just pray that I do not get sick from all these trips in and out of the cold. It's been a bitter cold too! I feel pretty good for all the action I have been doing. Was wheezing a little tonight, but I just this minute realized that I have not had any of my meds today. I took last night's to the hospital with the intent of being home today with my hubby. There I go again, thinking!! :)

Well all have a good night and have a great week. God bless all. Hugs from Tennessee.

Diary, it is a new day! My husband came home from the hospital. Hip Hip Horray! He is still coughing awful. I hope the medicine he came home with helps that. Last night I woke up with the most awful toothache and my legs were giving me fits. I took one of my old pain pills and finally fell asleep. I slept for almost 12 hours. I just can't take those pills. I do feel rested...guess I should at that! Back to work tomorrow. Talking about snow the next few days. I hope it blows around this mountain and only snows a little bit!

Are there any cheap maids out there? My house is a disaster area...we still have the Christmas tree up. I don't think we even got all the trimmings up until it was time to take it down. We have all been sick during the holidays and all. Maybe our not so generous with her time daughter will offer to take it down. I can't get the boxes from one place to the other and my husband is not supposed to stretch or lift much.

Next week will be a busy one...doctors, doctors and more doctors. I go to my regular doctor Monday (hosp. followup), then on Thur. I see my pulmonary doctor and Friday, my husband sees his surgeon. No wonder we are broke!

I am going to get ready for bed, so all have a good day tomorrow. God Bless from Tennessee

Well Diary, I woke up with a sore throat...surely I didn't eat razor blades!!! My throat felt like it, though! It's a good day to stay home, we got somewhere around 4 or 5" of snow starting at lunch. I will venture out tomorrow...hopefully the roads will be cleared. I am from the big city and cannot get used to the way they clean streets here in rural Tennessee.

I feel more tired today and have terrible indigestion. I forgot to mail in my prescription for Prilosec. This is the first indigestion that I have had in several years. Stress always tears my tummy up. I take so much meds that it is hard to keep up with all of them.

I saw on the emails tonight where there was talk about coughing up blood. My nose stays sore all the time and it bleeds. I, too, cough up blood and am not sure which is from the nose and if any is from the lungs. I have every shade of red to rusty color blood. I know most of it is from my nose. I think wearing O2 24/7 doesn't help my nose from feeling yucky all the time. I pray that there will one day soon where I can throw away the O2 and breathe like I did 5 years ago. I was hardly ever sick then...colds, etc. I want to be free of PH. It is wearing me down. I try not to get depressed about it, but it just doesn't leave you alone. When you start feeling good, it smacks you down again.

Must go to bed and please Lord let me have a peaceful and restfull night. God bless from Tennessee

Well, I finally went back to work. It was a good day. I kept busy doing the weeks worth of work that had to be done and some more. Monday will be short because I go to the regular doctor...followup from last visit to hospital. Plenty of work will still be there. I truly feel good, except for the indigestion. Hurry up Prilosec and get here!

The snow melted today and the temps are so low that it will all be frozen by morning. Black ice is so common here on this mountain. You hit it before you know it. I need to go to Cookeville, about 35 miles away and check on a lift for my elec. wheelchair. Woe is me...it still sits in my dining room. My husband suggested that a few friends come over and put on one of their pickups and take it to work. At least when I have to go potty I won't have to wait for someone to push me with the manual wheelchair that I have there. I feel like such a bother asking for someone to get me drinks, take me to potty, etc. The only thing is that my desk is too low. My boss said they can put 2x4s under my desk so my legs can get under it. Why is the chasis so big? You think they could make them lower. It already looks like some giant monster.

It's now 9 p.m. here in Crossville and I want to spend a little time with my hubby before hitting they bed. I slept very well last night...thank you Lord. My husband, Tony, could not sleep due to his coughing. He went in the living room and slept in the recliner. Maybe we should get him a hospital bed! LOL

To all my PH friends, have a great weekend and remember someone else may have it worse than you or me! Love and God bless from Tennesse.

Well it's a new day! Not much to say, but I am trying to be faithful with this diary...never was a diary person. This is so much easier than jotting it down on paper. After a while I can't read my own writing. I went to the doctor for a followup visit. He is not my regular doctor, since she is still out on maternity leave. He is nice and compassionate. He felt the same as my doctor that they were doing everything to control my SPH...sleep apnea, high blood pressure and the edema. Matter of fact, I am now on 4 20mg diuretics a day to try and get rid of swelling in abdomen. After trying this for 3 days and it helps...check back in 3 weeks. He said if this doesn't work, I will have to go in the hospital for bed rest and lasix IVs. No more hospitals for me...this better work!!

Hip Hip Hooray! I did get my electric wheelchair moved from my dining room to my work. Now I can go potty without waiting for someone to push me!! Thank you Lord. We are shorthanded and I hated to call someone to take me. When I would walk, everyone would yell at me. What's a woman to do!! LOL When that water pill clicks in, they better get out of the hallway, 'cause "wheelin' momma" is on the road! LOL
My boss is a very special person...I trained him when he was a young lad. He is not only my friend and boss, but an elder at my church. He is willing to do whatever to make my job easier. He told me I could stay in the cubicle I'm in or move to another one where I could sit in my wheelchair. He's willing to raise my desk up so I can sit there (you feel like you're sitting on a throne, it is so big). He offered today to move the opening to the other side if I was too cold, since that cubie is close to the front door. I'm not sure about that cubie, maybe getting too close to the door...someone might give me a big push right out it!! LOL

Must go to bed so I can be refreshed to race down the hallways! God bless and lots of love from Tennessee.

By my clock it is close to the 22nd. I can't help it that I'm a late night computer person! First I would like to say "Happy Anniversary" to my Mom & Dad! The big "58"! I hpe my husband and I have that many years together...now remember we started a little later than they did. My Mom and Dad are two special people in my life. They wrote during WWII. They had never met...Dad would read and write letters for some guy my Mom wrote to from her home town. Finally Dad just started to write. Dad came to Ohio on a Friday and they met face-to-face and were married on Monday in Rossville, GA. I could probably count on half of one hand any fights or arguments they have had. Thanks for letting me share that with them. We are archiving my diary for my family to read my thought of the day.

Well, yesterday, the 21st, was my first day on 4 diuretics and thank God I had my electric wheelchair! We had two of my helpers out and one was at the other plant, so it was just me and the receptionist! It was so good to get up and go without waiting on someone else. Remember saying I was the "Wheelin' Momma". Well, today I proved my point. I was discussing with one of my coworkers that it would go up to 7 mph. They said let's see, so adventurous me turned the speed up and pushed forward...it sped fastly forward and when it hit the protector rug, it popped a rear wheelie! We laughed about that all day and everytime she came into the office, she would call me "Wheelin' Momma". LOL Ya got make life what it is...Fun!! If we didn't have laughter, we would just shrivel up and die! I am still too young to kick the bucket! Remind me of this when I find the lowest of low days!

I have decided to change cubies. The other one I will be able to stay in the chair and not get in and out all day long. I have an O2 tank carrier and won't have to lift it up between my knees. I will still have to get up and do the 7th inning stretch, so the old joints don't need oil or WD40 as my Dad would say.

Well, dear friends and family, it's time for my thoughts to lay down and rest for tomorrow is a new day and I thank you God for everyone I get. God bless and love from Tennessee.

Well Diary, today was a stay home and try to stay warm day. First off I did not feel well. Had the stomach bug yesterday and through the night. It is very cold here in Tennessee. I live on the Plateau...mountain between Nashville and Knoxville. We are the leveling off part. The windchill is below O. I know my midwestern and New England friends you are much colder, but you are used to it! Sometimes I think I should have moved farther south, but it was even cold in Miami last night.

Other than the bug, I feel really well. I believe that my prayers are working. My breathing is better and I am adjusting to the chair at work. I hope to go and look for lifts, so I have more mobility when getting from place to place. It is just impossible to get it in and out of our mini-van without one. Anyone know of any reliable, inexpensive ones around?

Not much to say today because I did nothing! Tomorrow my husband, Tony goes back to the surgeon for his appendix. I pray all is well there. So until next time, be blessed and have a great Friday!! Love from Tennessee...

It's another cold day here on the mountain! Last night was the night from h_ _ l! I could not sleep...my feet hurt, my tummy cramped and I was up and down all night. I called time and temp at 3:15 a.m. and it was 1 degree, called again around 5 and it was 0. That's not saying what the chill factor was. My stomach was still going bananas this morning, so I stayed home from work. I rested most of the day. I hope the nap I took around 3 p.m. won't keep me from sleeping tonight.

My husband went to his followup appointment from the hospital. His stitches, etc. look good...says he still has some pneumonia. Gave him more meds to take. We should own a pharmacutical company with all our meds and I'm not on the expensive ones yet!!

I watched one of my favorite shows tonight (Prescido Med) and they showed some of what you go through to have a lung transplant. The lady had a lung disease, didn't hear which one. It was interesting to watch.

Not much going on here, so I'm going to lie my head upon my pillow and hope for rest and peace....sleep too! So goodnight and God bless you and love from Tennessee....

Nothing exciting has really happened in the last few days. The weather is up and down and so is my pain threshold. This cold weather and my arthritis are battling and I think I'm losing. I find that I have been using my electric chair at work even for the short trips. I still get up and stretch every so often.

A gentleman is coming out to measure my van and see what the best deal is for a lift. I say one that is cheap and doesn't need much manpower. The one that lifts it right into the back of your van will cost around $2199! That made the old ticker stop for a minute! LOL I don't know how we are going to pay for it since our credit cards are maxed out and we have little money to pay bills. I look back 3 years ago and thought I had it made until retirement. Boy was I surprised! If it's not the house, vehicle, then it's your body that falls apart!! LOL

I hope all my pals in PH Land are doing well. I don't post very often, but I read a lot! I have an early morning, so it's nighty nite! God bless and love from Tennessee...

Today is another unusual day. Last night was my night to go to bed early...no sleep for the weary. Just as I was settling in for my nightly snooze, the phone rings and it's the nurse from my husband's work. She tells me to meet them at the ER because his blood pressure is too high. First of all the weather was awful (foggy with rain) so he drove the van, which I usually drive. I said I have no vehicle and Oh, my God, he didn't remove my oxygen from the car. So here I was without vehicle and O2! Thank God I have been feeling so much better. I called my sister-in-law and she had to get her 5 yo daughter up and take me to the ER. After about an hour I was finally hooked up to O2. They took my husband right in and tried to get him to stay all night, but no he wouldn't. Everything seemed OK, but the doctor wants him to have the stress test done and gave him some new med. Sorry if I'm rambling, but I am so tired...if it's not me, it's been him in the hospital. I told the ER nurse that she felt more like family, since I've seen her more often in the last few months.

I truly do feel so much better than I have in months, maybe years. Work is good...I take it nice and slow and try not to stress out. I find if I feel like it, I do what I am doing now, just get on the net and type my diary, etc. So far, no one seems to mind. I feel like over the years (20 +)I have given more to my job than I did my family. It's not that I'm such a career woman, I guess it was that I truly liked my job. It is hard for me to think of not working...I don't know what to do with my time at home. I can't run the sweeper or do laundry...both exhaust me. I have to go up and down stairs to do laundry. Sometimes I sit down on a bar stool just to cook. It is so hard for me to slow down when I feel this good, but I know I need to reserve my energy for those bad days. I would much rather have them less frequent than one every several days.

Diary, I find myself rambling again, so I will close for now. God bless and love from Tennessee..

I've been under the weather the last few days. I think it is mostly my sinuses. I've had a headache for several days and have a low energy level. I stayed in Saturday, then stayed in again Sunday. Slept most of both days and nights. The headache was so bad this morning I stayed home from work. I couldn't wake up and move it hurt so bad. Not like a migraine, but it was all I could do to get up at 11 a.m.

I have been feeling so good and doing things at a slow pace so I wouldn't get sick and now this. I wish there was an end to PH and a cureall pill to take.

My boss' birthday was last Friday and he was on a missions trip to Panama, so one of the girls in the office called and said they were celebrating tomorrow. Now I have to make something. Thank God for my husband...he went to the store and got stuff to fix.

Tonight is going to be short and sweet. Thanks for you that emailed me. God bless and love from Tennessee...

Today was the day of no energy. I trudged along at work and thought the day would never end. We all brought food in for my boss' birthday and I was too tired to even eat...we better record this day! My stomach is tender and I feel nauseated and have a sinus headache. If today wasn't bad enough, the doctor's office (pulmonary) left a message on my home answering machine. I called them back and they asked me if I had my sleep study. I said, yes on the 13th. If I go in Thurs. and they still do not have the results, I'm gonna go postal!!

I get so agravated at professionals and their lack of communication. It only took me 4 tries to get the darn thing done anyway. I can see that this is going to be a gripe session for me, so I will close and try it again maybe tomorrow. God bless and lots of love from Tennessee...

Well, I wish I could say that I felt as good as I did last time I wrote. I just got home from a 10 day stay in the hospital with pneumonia. This time I ran a high fever around 103. I still feel drained. The way my cards are falling, this may be the year that I try disability. I did not work enough last year to qualify for Family Medical Leave or my short-term disability where I would get paid. I took vacation for the last two weeks and it won't be long before it is gone. If I take unpaid medical leave, then I will lose my insurance and have to pay COBRA...$500 for me, no dental and 1100 for me and my husband with dental. Don't know where you are supposed to get the money for insurance when you don't get paid.

Enough of my sad songs. I will chat more when I'm not so tired and down and out! Love from Tennessee...

I wasn't going to write today...feeling blue. Then I got an email from Ruth and it brightened my evening.

I go back to work tomorrow and I'm not really wanting to, since I am really tired. Tomorrow is my mother's 77th birthday and she asked me what I wanted for dinner. I said it's your bithday, I should fix it for you or take you out. My mom is the most wonderful mother. I'm so glad I've got to spend the last almost 56 years with her. She always knows you need something without ever having to ask. I could never do wrong and when I really did, she never said I told you so. No matter what choices I made, she always was there but never made me feel wrong. She would always say, "You know when you've done wrong and I will be there to pick up the pieces." She's just the greatest. I hope that my children think of me the way I think of her. It says it all about being a mother.

I guess I'm a little sentimental tonight. I am just glad that I have had my mom this long and hope for many years to come. Love you Mom.

Going to go to bed and try to sleep...a little early for me. Take care my friends and love and God bless from Tennessee...

Here I am again, my conscience... It was such a beautiful weekend (we've had so much rain) and where did I spend it but either in bed or on the couch. Our yearly home show was this weekend and I really wanted to go. Saturday I was so tired from working my first week out of the hospital, so I stayed in. Got up Sunday morning ready to shower and my husband found a leak in our bathroom. One of the lines broke, so off to Lowe's for him. We had planned on going to the home show after church. I laid back in bed while he went on his little trip and slept for 3 more hours. I guess we didn't make it to church or to the home show. I laid around all day Sunday. I had some terrible stomach cramps too.

Here it is Monday and guess what I did today...sleep. I know my iron is extremely low, I have been anemic for over a year. The iron pills with B-12, etc. do not help. This last stay in the hospital my doctor gave me two iron injections, since my insurance will not pay for vitamins. She said she was writing them a long letter explaining how much more cost effective it would be to pay for the $300 vial of iron than to give blood transfusions every 3-6 months. Also the risks to me in doing so. Maybe this will help. Our insurance is company owned. They keep telling us things haven't changed, but they used to pay for my iron pills and now they don't.

I go to my PCP Wednesday and I'm going to ask for something to give me energy. I am just way too tired. I am going to say a little prayer for energy tonight. I need to work to keep my insurance, but today was not one of those days. I slept from around midnight to around 1:30 p.m. this afternoon. I got up about three times to go potty. I could just lay down now and sleep more, but I refuse to do so. Do any of you have days like this often?

Not to help matters...my birthday is soon. I'm refusing to say I'm another year older, because I am really only one day older! LOL Now that I've made everyone that reads this tired, I will close for now. Have a great week. Love and God Bless from Tennessee...

It's been a while since my last entry. I 've had so many different emotions in the last few months. After getting out of the hospital in February, I just have not bounced back. I'm grouchy, hateful, want to sleep all the time and don't want to be around anybody, even family. My poor husband usually gets the brunt of my emotions. The doctor has me working only 4 hours a day and some days that is all I can take. I've had a terrible cough since Friday and haven't left the house since I got home. Today I slept until 1:30 p.m. I just can't motivate myself. It takes so long to get ready in the morning. My husband has to help with washing my hair and sometimes just giving me a shower. I cannot hold my hands above my head and breathe. I sit on the commode while my husband dries my hair...he does the best he can. Like he says I'm not a hairdresser. I've learned to live with my hair. I am probably totally grey by now. Before my 50th birthday (now 56) I started coloring my hair again. My grey hair does not have the texture that my natural brown did. Also the meds don't help...it is so straight and I used to have naturally wavy with lots of body. All the body I've got now is flesh!!! LOL

I am trying to get out of this depression and I want to live a better life, but just getting motivated is tough. I see these ads on TV where people without legs run marathons or are in wheelchair races and they have this great outlook on life. I wish I did. I use to go here and there and nothing stopped me. Well, I can say one thing for PH, it can slam you in the door sometimes.

I must go to bed now...work tomorrow! Take care my friends and my light at the end of the tunnel is that I know God is with me throughout all this. God bless from TN....

This past weekend was wonderful, even the weather. My son and his new girlfriend came in from Virginia. We didn't know what to expect since he broke up with his girlfriend of 7 years in January. It's hard when new people are brought into your lives when you loved the old girlfriend as your own. Well, we weathered through. I didn't get to meet her until Saturday morning. She stayed at my Mom's house and my son at mine. She turned out to be this wonderful charming girl and very personable. We had to explain to my 5 yr. old niece not to mention the other girl's name. We just knew she would ask where she was.

Mother's Day was a delight. As southern women go, my mother insisted on cooking breakfast. That's her treat. She doesn't understand that we are celebrating her day! The kids got off around 11 a.m. cst. because Lindsey had a curfew of 11 p.m. (she's 21). It's great to know that some families still have rules. My son even had to promise her mom that she would stay in the same house with him. That night when she called to say they made it alright, I thanked her for sharing Mother's Day with me and my family, instead of with her Mom and Grandma.

Now back to reality! I was starting to feel bad Sunday evening. Monday I was feeling worse and thought I might have kidney stones. It hurt to potty and I was passing clots. Went to the ER, since I have low iron. Couldn't find stones, but I have a severe kidney infection. Talk about knocking you off you feet. I think I slept most of the time at the hospital on my side. The only way I was partly comforable. If it ain't one hill to climb, it's two!

Rested today and will try the workforce again tomorrow. Until later, God Bless from TN...

Hello Diary,  Just trying out the new system.  I have so much to tell.  Been in the hospital and now no longer get to work, says both my PCP and Pulmonary Dr.  I guess the new battle is with SS disability.  Will get on again soon now that I understand new system. 

Thanks Kathryn for all the hard work.

Pat in TN...God Bless and Happy Independance Day!

Dear Diary - It's been a long hard 5 months!!  I will be short tonight since it is so late.  What I will say is by the grace of our Heavenly Father I am here writing to you tonight.  I am applying for SS, so please pray that it goes thru soon.  Even though life has been hard for me, my husband and family had the worse. They stood by and prayed diligently, even when the doctors gave up...not once, but 3 times.  I'm thankful that the Lord let be be unaware of what was going on.  I was in a drugged sleep for 3 weeks.

I will write down details later.

Love and miss all my friends at PH Central.  Be blessed in all you do.

Pat from TN

Dear Diary - It has been a long and hard battle, but the Lord came through for me. I faguely remember getting up and going to the restroom late on July 18.  I had called out for my husband to call the ambulance to take me to the ER.  I walked from my bedroom to the livingroom, because the gurney would not go through our hallway.  From that moment on I lost three weeks of my life.  I was checked in to the hospital and spent the nexty38 days in ICU.  I had 4 IV poles, each with 4 or 5 bags on them.  I was in a drugged state...trying to keep me from pulling out all the tubes.  I had an "A" line in each arm and a line up next to my jugular vein.  I must have been one site to see.  The doctors gave up on me 3 times, but the Lord pulled me through.

They had to restrain me because I was trying to get up.  Not a nice thing to do to someone clostrophobic.  I could not stand it and fought to be free.  I had quit breathing and my kidneys had shutdown.  As soo as they got air into my system, everything started to work properly.

Well, diary I am getting mighty tired, so I will continue my story another day.

God Bless an love from Pat in TN

Diary - Today was a good and bad day!

I was feeling pretty rotten today.  Did a lot of running to doctors and then weekend stuff.  So today I was wiped out!!   My husband told me last week that our Pastor wanted us at a meeting today at 3:30.  Well, I decided I wasn't going.  My ex-boss' wife (he's also an elder at church)called and said that I had to be at this meeting.  Well, then, it must be important so I got ready and went.  It was a surprise "Retirement" party from work.  It made me feel like I had contributed something to deserve this.  My boss is the VP, Director of Quality for 4 TN plants, 2 PA plants and one in Mexico.  There was also the Executive VP of Operations for TN and Mexico.  Made me feel so very fortunate to have made so many friends in the last 21 years. 

People surprise me all the time anymore.  These people were by my side while I was in ICU.  I was asleep (drugged) most of their visits, but they still prayed for my recovery.  God heard everyone of their prayers too.

So today ended up being a good day after all.  A day spent with "special" friends.  Thanks you all.

I am getting so tired and I must be rambling on by now. So good night and God Bless you.  Pat from TN

Happy Holidays

MERRY CHRISTMAS

It's been two months since my last entry.  I am typing with one and not much of another hand.  Dec. 5 I had two surgeries at one time. My ulnar (?) nerve was pinched when I woke up during my 38 day stay in ICU back in July & Aug.  I had no feeling in my left little finger and part of the next finger...not much use.  When they did the first surgery it was for carpal tunnel and the ulnar nerve; the second surgery was just below the elbow...12 stiches in all.  This past Mon. I had the full arm cast removed and stitches out.  I'm wearing a brace for the next few weeks.  Can't wait to have normal use of all my facilities. 

I have a new loaner trach...the metal Jackson trach.  They want to plug it up and let me breathe through my nose and out my mouth...no such luck.  They have found that my vocal cords are not widening like they should, thus not breathing through nose, etc.  I go to Vanderbilt Hospital's Voice Clinic in Jan. to see if they can correct.  One suggestion was Botox injections in my vocal cord muscle...how about a little around the forehead, eyes and anywhere else showing age!  :)

Will write more when hands are better.  Love and God Bless from Pat in TN...

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