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Do I Have To Ask?

By Jenni Messel


I've never been a big fan of asking others for help. It's just not something that comes easily for me. I feel that other people are busy and I'm only being a bother. (I'm pretty sure that my ex-husband is partially to blame for this, because he was always too busy for me.) I'm not comfortable asking for help, so I typically don't ask.

There is also the case of asking for something other than help. That's equally difficult for me. I can easily recall times in which I've refused to call the doctor, without a day's worth of nagging from my new husband, because I didn't want to bother the doctor.

Being a PAH patient has forced me to face this issue more head-on than I would have liked. The reason being that there are times as a PAH patient that we must ask for help, because our very welfare depends on it.

When I was diagnosed with Pulmonary Arterial Hypertension in October 2003, I was, as one cardiologist put it, "a very, very sick girl". My journey to diagnosis was a long and winding road of doctors and specialists that all said about the same thing - "there is really nothing wrong with you, other than maybe a little anxiety". By the time I was diagnosed I could barely make it across my living room without stopping to catch my breath. Huffing and puffing is not something you're supposed to do leaning against the wall after you've only walked across the living room, especially when you're 26 years old and "there isn't anything wrong with you".

Being this sick put me in a place where I had to ask for help.

I couldn't get dressed by myself, without nearly passing out, and I couldn't run around naked all day - I had to ask for help.

I couldn't bend over to put on my socks and my feet were cold - I had to ask for help.

I couldn't pay the medical bills that were piling up because I didn't have insurance and I hadn't been healthy enough to work in months - I had to ask for help.

I finally became unable to drive because I was having seizures related to my PAH and I still needed to get from doctor to doctor - I had to ask for help.

Over the past two years, I've learned to ask for help when I need it. I can't say that it feels any better to me yet, but at least I've learned to do it. Comfort will come in its own time.

In learning to ask for help I've learned a lot of other things, too. I've learned who my friends really are. I've learned what family really means. I've learned that true love will rise above the diagnosis of a terminal illness. I've also learned that getting by - even with PAH - is possible, with a little help.

You just have to ask!


Ways To Ask For Financial Help

  1. Call Your Doctor's Office. Many people are unaware that it is possible to get assistance with the bill from your doctor. By calling the fine folks with Financial Services or Billing in your doctor's office, you can find out what assistance is offered. Some offices will discount your bill, set you up on an affordable monthly payment plan, or both!
     
  2. Call The Hospital. Just as many people are unaware that it may be possible to get assistance with the cost of care at your local hospital. Speak to a Hospital Social Worker. It is their job to know what programs exist and how you can find out more about the programs.
     
  3. Call Your Pharmaceutical Companies. Many drug makers understand the expense associated with prescriptions. They also understand that not everyone has great prescription drug coverage. Therefore, many drug makers offer discount plans for the drugs they manufacture. For example, Actelion offers the Tracleer Access Program [(866) 228-3546]. Pfizer offers Pfizer Pfriends to help those without insurance obtain a discount on Pfizer drugs [(866) 776-3700]. Check with each pharmaceutical company that you require medications from, they may have a discount or assistance program!
     
  4. Call Your Other Creditors. Many companies we deal with for our mortgages, electricity, water, and credit card accounts offer assistance or temporarily relaxed payment arrangements. Call before you are overwhelmed! A lot of companies would rather work with you so they get their money, rather than turn off your power or kick you out in the street!

 

September 16, 2005

Jenni is a staff member and feature editor here at PHC. She also writes a Patient Diary.

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